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Funerals & Cemetery
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"Death is grim…but the life beyond, which God in his mercy will give us, is most desirable. Truly, in no way must we lose heart because, even though we are weak, our weakness is not nearly as great as God’s mercy toward those who want to love Him and place all their hope in Him.”
– St. Francis de Sales -
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Saint Francis Xavier Funeral Guidelines
The Funeral Planning Process
Upon the death of your loved one please contact the funeral home that you will be working with (we request that all funerals be arranged through a funeral home). Prior to the death of your loved one, however, please contact the Pastor so that he may administer the Sacrament of Anointing of the Sick if at all possible. After you contact the funeral director, he/she will in turn contact us to determine available dates/times for the visitation, Funeral Mass/Liturgy, luncheon, etc. After you meet with the funeral home/director to plan things with them regarding their services, please contact the Pastor to arrange a meeting with him (and the Director of Sacred Music) to plan the actual Funeral Mass/Liturgy/church specific details.
What is the best time for the Funeral Mass/Liturgy?
Typically, a Funeral Mass/Liturgy will begin at 11:00am, with a visitation at church for 1-2 hours beforehand. If you would prefer a different time/arrangment, however, please ask the funeral director to contact the Pastor to see about his and the church's availability. We will do all that we reasonably can to accommodate your needs. Funerals do not take place on Sundays, Holy Days, or during the Sacred Triduum (Holy Thursday through Easter Sunday).
Guest Priests or Deacons
If you/the family of the deceased would like a guest member of the clergy to be present at the Funeral Mass/Liturgy a letter of suitability must be obtained by the cleric and given to the Pastor (unless the cleric is from the Diocese of Madison). The Pastor should also be asked beforehand. Generally, the Pastor will preside over all Funeral Masses/Liturgies at Saint Francis Xavier, but the guest priest/deacon is welcome to concelebrate/assist so long as he is in good standing in his respective diocese. At the discretion of the Pastor, the guest priest/deacon may be permitted to be the principal celebrant if there are good reasons for such a request, and/or offer the homily, preside over the final commendation, or lead the prayers at the cemetery.
Mass or Funeral Liturgy outside of Mass?
The standard and preferred practice for a deceased Catholic who dies in good standing with the Catholic Church is a full Mass with the body present. As such, a Mass is always the presumed option in these types of situations. If there is a question about whether a Funeral Liturgy outside of Mass might be more appropriate, however, the family should speak with the Pastor. In a case where the deceased is not really a practicing Catholic, or lived a life publicly contradicting Catholic beliefs and practice, a Liturgy outside of Mass might be more appropriate. Once again, please discuss this with the Pastor when you meet with him.
Full body (and a casket) or cremains (and an urn)?
While the Church allows for cremation and the celebration of the Funeral Mass/Liturgy in the presence of the cremains (in an urn), the Church's strong preference is that the full body be present (in a casket) for the Funeral Mass/Liturgy, if at all possible (and if the deceased is to be cremated this be done after the Funeral Mass/Liturgy). For more information, please click here.
If you have any further questions, please contact the Pastor.
Eulogies
Part of the grieving process includes time to remember the life of your deceased loved one. In the Catholic Funeral Rite, this is most appropriately done during the visitation and/or at the funeral luncheon. Since the Funeral Mass/Liturgy is primarily a time of prayer (please see the video above), the Diocese of Madison has a diocesan-wide policy that restricts eulogies to the time of visitation and/or the funeral luncheon. At Saint Francis Xavier we typically recommend that they take place during the funeral luncheon (although they are not by any means required). If you or another person would like to offer a eulogy during the luncheon please let the Pastor know when you meet with him, and we will provide you with a microphone and a lectern in the parish hall.
Funeral Luncheons
At Saint Francis Xavier we are blessed to have a group of wonderful volunteers who help to coordinate and serve funeral luncheons if this is of interest to you. If you are interested, please inform the funeral home and they will be able to arrange this with the church.
Music
Because the Funeral Mass/Liturgy is primarily about praying to God for the deceased, all music that is played in church ("God's house") must be of a sacred nature and appropriate for Divine Worship. If you are interested in having a secular song played or sung in memory of your loved one, this may be done at the funeral luncheon in the parish hall (with the permission of the Pastor and assuming it is appropriate; please speak with him/the Director of Sacred Music when you meet with them to inquire). -
Saint Francis Xavier Catholic CemeteryContact Information
Cemetery Sexton:
Laura Wenman
608-798-0100
(or send her a message below) -
Cemetery Guidelines for Placing DecorationsDecorations are meant to honor the dead and when tastefully done can make the entire cemetery look beautiful. Please observe the following:
- Live plantings are not permitted.
- Avoid the use of glass vases, vigil lights, glass urns, lawn decorations or anything made of breakable material.
- Decorations should attach to the monument or be placed as close to the cement base as possible to be out of the way for mowing and grass trimming.
- In the Columbarium area no flowers or plants, real or artificial, are permitted.
Schedule for placing/removing decorations:
The schedule below is followed to allow for cemetery maintenance and clean up each spring and fall. Please be sure to remove all decorations (Including shepherd's hooks) by the dates noted.
- March 1st: Winter decorations removed
- May 1st: Summer decorations may be placed
- October 15th: Summer decorations removed
- November 15th: Winter decorations may be put out after this date
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